Top of the Pops 30 Aug & 6 Sep 1990

 

Words: Chris Arnsby

 30/08/1990

 The observant among you might be wondering why the last write up confidently asserted it  covered the 16/08/1990 edition, for a second time. It didn't. It was supposed to read 23/08/1990. This was the cat's fault. It has now been banned from jumping on the keyboard. (John- And my fault for not noticing either but it shows we are not A.I)

 Mark Goodier: “Ah! Good evening. Hello. Welcome to Top Of the Pops. Britain's favourite TV and radio pop show. Tonight, the complete top forty. Who's number one? You'll see the number one later and of course we have all the major climbers on the charts and big stars. We start with a band who are always the sound of sunshine. Here's Aswad.

 [25] ASWAD: Next To You. Back to business as usual for Top of the Pops with Paul Ciani credited as the producer and director. It's been just over a year since Asward last appeared, 10/08/1989 with On And On. What have they been doing in the meantime? Shopping for keytars. Three of them, issued to everyone on stage who isn't Brinsley Forde or the drummer.

[24] SONIA: End Of The World. “There's a lady over there...” says Mark Goodier in a way that makes me think he's setting up a pre-recorded performance. It turns out Sonia is very much present in the studio this week and Ron Bristow shows off some lovely lighting effects. Sonia is stood between bars of blue lights cast through the studio smoke. It looks great, better than the song needs. It is a dreary ballad. Sonia has gone serious artiste. You can tell because she is wearing a big coat and standing still.

CHARTS: 40 TO 31

[11] THE KLF: What Time Is Love? Three studio performances in a row. How long is it since that last happened? [please wait...] Oh. Not as long as I thought. It's actually about six weeks. The 12/07/1990 edition which cycled through Gun, River City People, and Blue Pearl.

The KLF are great, as always, although they've only brought two keytars. They've clearly reviewed their performance from 16/08/1990 to make some minor improvements. M.C. Bello, the keyboard player, and the highkicking lady are now all stood at the front of the stage, turned away from the audience with their arms raised. As the introduction continues, first the keyboard player and then highkicker drop their arms, then simultaneously turn to face the crowd and start rockin' out*. The performance is more focused and unified and polished to look good for television. This may sound cynical but what's the point on being on television if you are not going to look amazing?

I wouldn't normally say this but I think Paul Ciani misses a trick. Before the introduction is over he cuts to a handheld camera pointing at Bill Drummond/Jimmy Cauty noodling away on a keyboard. I think he should have held the first shot and slowly pushed in so M.C. Bello was in a big close up when he started rapping. The introduction has a churning sense of building power and cutting away works against the song rather than with it. That said, this is a performance for the ages. Full of energy and movement and flashing lights and electronic effects. I love it. It rather makes me regret giving The KLF performance of the week two weeks ago.

*If you have a Keytar, only rockin' out is allowed. All other moves are FORBIDDEN!

[14] STEVE MILLER BAND: The Joker. Promo VT. “It doesn't matter why this record is back in the charts,” scolds Mark Goodier, “it's good that it is.”

The song charted off the back of this Levi's advert https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAHNihB_kzY, the one with the motorcyclist who picks up his girl from the office. Or, as the Mary Whitehouse Experience used to refer to it, the one where “they'd never let that bike past security anyway.”

[4] BETTY BOO: Where Are You Baby? Another storming performance. The handheld camera operators are earning their money this week. Watch out for the moment when one of them moves towards the back of the Filmstrip stage, where there is a ladder-like piece of scenery with gaps. They grab an angle on Betty Boo through a gap, then move down to continue the shot through a lower gap and then move back round to the front of the stage. It's all done in a single unbroken movement.

CHARTS: 30 to 11

[3] NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK: Tonight. Promo VT.

[23] JASON DONOVAN: Rhythm Of The Rain. NKOTB and Jason Donovan bring the fun to a halt.

TOP 10

[1] BOMBALURINA: Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini. BBC VT. A repeat from 09/08/1990. Timmy Mallet's done with Top of the Pops, clearly he was really annoyed by Nicky Campbell's “incredibly unprofessional” link from camera rehearsals last week. (John- In case you were wondering, the name Bombalurina is from TS Eliot's poem `The Naming of Cats`. I'm sure he never imagined it being used in association with something like this song though)

[31] WHITESNAKE: Now You're Gone. Promo VT. Jakki Brambles next week.

Performance of the week: Betty Boo, Where Are You Baby. If you prefer, then pretend she got performance of the week for the 16/08/1990 edition, and it was The KLF this week. Both are correct. It's like Schroedinger's cat which is both on and off my keyboard at the same time.

 06/09/1990

 Jakki Brambles: “Hello. And welcome along to the nation's top music show and you can hear us loud and proud in stereo on Radio 1FM. The key word for tonight's show is funky and we're starting off, Elvis style-e at number twenty three, please welcome into the Top of the Pops studio, Adamski.

 [23] ADAMSKI: THE SPACE JUNGLE. The audience rapidly become sluggish and dull. When Adamski saunters round, to sit in front of his keyboard, one of the studio crew feels the need to shake them out of their torpor. “Can't hear ya! C'mon! Woo!” He yells, which is unfortunate because he's the loudest thing in the studio. It underlines the general lack of enthusiasm for whatever it is Adamski thinks he's doing. Clearly, he should have continued working with Seal.

Rhetorical question of the week. How much control does the studio gallery have over elements of the picture? Chris Kempton is back on Lighting and he colours Adamski mainly red and blue. Now it could just be a really strong red light but it's got a lurid glow to it. Close to the start of Adamski's performance you get a camera angle looking back into the studio, when you can see an operator sitting on a crane. This person's shirt is literally glowing red like he's in Tron but the rest of the colours look relatively natural. Martin Kempton is credited as Vision Supervisor this week, does he have the ability to massively turn up the colour red and leave other colours mostly unaffected?

On the final pull back to Jakki Brambles the red seems to lose its intensity, as if someone is turning a dial back to normal, but this could just be a side effect of the main studio lights coming up.

And, how come Adamski's caption is ALL CAPS?

[14] MARIAH CAREY: Vision Of Love. Promo VT. There's an eerie effect caused by the Quantel transition into the video. A ghost image of Jakki Brambles and the audience is briefly left on the screen, as if it's been burned in. “Mariah Carey. What a voice. What looks. Makes me sick,” is Jakki Brambles post-video verdict.

CHARTS: 40 TO 31

[31] TALK TALK: Life's What You Make It. Promo VT.

[28] THE FARM: Groovy Train. “Discovered by Peter Powell,” no less. I think we'd all like to see David Attenborough style footage of that expedition.

The Farm aimed for impressive trouser coordination but alas only the budget would only stretch to four pairs of white slacks. The keyboard player and drummer have to muddle through as best they can.

TOP 5 AUGUST ALBUMS

When this new monthly feature started in July I cynically predicted it would be forgotten by September, here's Paul Ciani proving me wrong. There's been a small format change as well, the chart listing now tells you the name of the song playing as well as the album and artist.

[5] I'M BREATHLESS: Madonna: Vogue

[4] THE ESSENTAL PAVAROTTI: Luciano Pavarotti: Nessum Dorma

[3] … BUT SERIOUSLY: Phil Collins: Something Happened on the Way to Heaven

[2] STEP BY STEP: New Kids on the Block: Step by Step

[1] SLEEPING WITH THE PAST: Elton John: Club on the End of the Street. Promo VT not seen on Top of the Pops because the single didn't hit the Top 40. Also, I think Elton John prefers it to be called the Club at the End of the Street.

[29] CARON WHEELER: Livin' In The Light. Sorry Caron. I can't think of anything to say.

CHARTS: 30 to 11. Wake in fright from the cadaverous gaze of undead Jive Bunny!

[4] DEE-LITE: Grove Is In The Heart. Promo VT. I wonder if this will be Number One next week?

[21] LOOSE ENDS: Don't Be A Fool. I've struck out again. Apologies to all concerned.

TOP 10

[1] BOMBALURINA: Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini. Promo VT.  Timmy Mallet really is done with Top of the Pops. At the start and end of the video a polka-dot bikini is overlaid on the screen. It's more of a green, than yellow. It's also not teeny weeny. When it's overlaid on Jakki Brambles at the end, the top bit sits under her nose and makes it look like she's grown a polka dot moustache. Last month it was pizza and foam-rubber Turtles. What will she get in October?

[32] JANET JACKSON: Black Cat. Promo VT. Gary Davies next week.

 Performance of the week: It could either be The Fall or Loose Ends. I'll leave it up to fate. Heads it's The Fall. Tales it's Loose Ends. It's Loose Ends.