Reviewed by Chris
Arnsby. Gary Davies: "Hi. How you doing? And welcome to Top of the
Pops. Live Thursday night and the show tonight brought to you in black [points
to Richard Skinner who is wearing a black shirt] and white [points to self, in
white shirt].
Richard Skinner: What a great chart this week. Loads of new
entries. We have the best of those nen...entries on the show. First, Phil
Fearon, Galaxy."
[27] Phil Fearon & Galaxy: What Do I Do? Top
of the Pops has gradually cranked up the number of live editions; three in
1981; 10 in 1982; 11 in 1983. This edition is the fifth live show of 1984 and
in total there will be 23 across the year. Expanding the number of live
programmes also means expanding the number of hosts who can be trusted not to disgrace
themselves on prime time BBC1. John Peel, David Jensen, and Simon Bates have
been the preferred live hosts, but now Mike Read, Mike Smith, Janice Long,
Richard Skinner, and probably a few more, are added to the roster. Steve Wright
has noticeably not been asked to front a live edition. Michael Hurll really
doesn't seem to like him.
It's carnival night in the Top of the Pops emergency
strike studio. That means free maracas for everyone, flouncy dresses for some
of the female cheerleaders, and, erm, what appear to be UFO style string
vests for some of the men. Footage from the Rio carnival is projected onto the
big screen behind the band and at one point the caption "UNIAO DA
ILHA" flashes along the bottom of the footage. Perhaps the footage is
taken from Carnival in Rio with Anne Nightingale and Ivan Lessa
[20/01/1983]. Alas my schoolboy Portuguese is inadequate to the task of
translating the various websites that come up after a Google search of this
enigmatic phrase. (Portugese John- Apparently it means `Union of the Island`.)
A previously rehearsed spontaneous conga line forms at the end of the song. The
spirit of Flick Colby still hovers over the Top of the Pops studio.
[2] Kool & The Gang: Joanna. Another chance to
see the video recorded at Joanna's diner where nobody can place an order
because The Gang, and Kool, take up all the seats. The service is terrible.
Whenever someone places an order Joanna gazes off all dewy-eyed into the middle
distance and remembers when she danced at The Cotton Club. I'm not tipping.
These fried eggs are rubbery.
[36] The Weather Girls: It's Raining Men.
Thunderbolts and lightning in a BBC studio. It's either a cunning special
effect by vision mixers Angela Wilson and Shirley Coward (yes, two vision
mixers are credited this week, for some reason) or static discharging from the
string vests adorning two of the male dancers; keep an eye on them for some
particularly vain posing.
[32] Tracey Ullman: My Guy. "It's twenty to
eight," says Richard Skinner glancing at his watch. Don't let Simon Bates
catch you stealing his gimmick. He'll be livid. Why not hold up a portable TV
tuned to BBC1 if you have to prove the show is live? Or show a copy of today's Times and make a satirical reference
to Caspar Weinberger. Meanwhile, here's the video for Tracey Ullman's gender
swapped cover of Madness' My Girl. Complete with Neil Kinnock cameo, for
reasons which never become clear.
[37] Sade: Your Love Is King. Sade makes her entrance
with the BBC smoke machine set to smooth. It's an arresting performance but
blimey those lyrics. "I'm coming/I'm dancing inside." Filth. Did
Frankie Goes To Hollywood die in vain?
[38] Bananarama: Robert
De Niro’s Waiting. There's a limp piece of banter before the charts when
Richard Skinner gives Gary Davies "a brand new medallion." I'd
forgotten the 1980s medallion man trope. David Copperfield* played a character
of the same name on Three Of A Kind, and there was also Kirk St. Moritz
on Dear John in 1987. Gary Davies' embrace of the image seems odd given
that the medallion men were always portrayed as losers.
The person who compiles the chart is having an off day. Sade
becomes Slade (which requires an on-air correction from Richard Skinner) and by
number 11 the anonymous chart minion has come out on strike in sympathy with
the Scene Shifters and written Various, rather than type out in full (brace
yourselves) "Bolero/Barnum on Ice the music used by Torvill and Dean by
the Richard Hartley/Michael Reed Orchestra."
[12] Howard Jones: Hide and Seek. Gary Davies is keen
to stress the live nature of Top of the Pops with Howard Jones "not
just appearing live, but playing live, and singing live." And being alive
Gary. And the electrics in his keyboard are live as well. Don't forget that.
Howard Jones is upstaged by the dry ice machine which is set to pipe-smoker's
fug. The song is a bit dull and the audience quickly get bored and start to
fidget. They're considerably more excited to spot themselves on the studio
monitors.
[1] Nena: 99 Red Balloons. Another repeat of the
performance from the 16/02/1984 edition of Top of the Pops.
[31] Mel Brooks: Hitler Rap. On video. Finally some
context for the "Mel Brooks is totally obsessed with Nazis" jokes
from the 1985 Spitting Image book which I didn't understand at the time.
Personally I'd rather have the theme from Fraggle Rock, down at 33, but
it's fun to imagine the baffled reaction of David Attenborough fans tuning in
early for The Living Planet.
*no, not that David Copperfield**
** or that one.
Performance of the week: The Weather Girls: It's Raining
Men
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