Top of the Pops 11 Oct 1984

Reviewed by Chris Arnsby with toast. Mike Read: "Hello, welcome to Top of the Pops." Tommy Vance & Mike Read: " 'Allo, 'allo, 'allo, 'allo, 'allo. 'Ello, 'ello, 'ello, 'ello, 'ello." Tommy Vance: "Got the picture? 'Ere Mike, 'ave you seen who's down there?"

Mike Read: " 'Ello.'Ello." Tommy Vance: "Ooh, it's Kim Wilde."

[52] Kim Wilde: The Second Time. I'm charitably assuming that Tommy Vance says "ooh" and not "phwoar" which would obviously be an unacceptable way to refer to gorgeous pouting, etc Kim Wilde. I've no idea what Tommy Vance and Mike Read are doing in their introduction. Maybe they were plugging the start of series 3 of 'Allo 'Allo; 7.30 Friday, BBC1.

The best thing about Mike Read and Tommy Vance's introduction is it's location. For the first time in ages (ie, I can't be bothered to check but I'm going out on a limb and speculating that it's at least since 1981 when Yellow Pearl became the theme tune) the hosts don't introduce the show standing next to the neon Top of the Pops logo. Instead they're up on one of the catwalks. Check out the view of the studio behind them. Phwoar! Now that leaves nothing to the imagination. If only Mike Read and Tommy Vance would move out of the way we could really cop an eyeful.

It's a little glimpse behind the scenes as the studio warms up for the first act. There are a couple of dancers/audience cheerleaders standing on a podium who applaud and then start dancing, and round the fringes of the crowd you can see the usual gang of mystery BBC employees whose function is obscure. (John – Undercover ITV agents probs)

[22] Sade: Smooth Operator. On film. How the eighties would like you to imagine it looked all the time. All full of sultry sexy people being all sultry and sexy in smoky clubs. (John- It really was like that! Oh and there were lots of slow motion doves and mirrors cracking too.)

[3] Wham!: Freedom. George Michael gets to cut loose after having to be all restrained for Careless Whisper. The Producer this week is getting good use out of the hand-held cameras and catching some unusual angles of the studio. Who is it? It's not Michael Hurll. He's still away tending to Noel Edmonds and his Late Late Breakfast Show. Gordon Elsbury is off preping the return of Entertainment USA. Tertiary stand in Brian Whitehouse who handled the 04/10/1984 edition is also away, presumably off on holiday having overseen The Hot Shoe Show which ended on 20/09/1984. This week veteran Light Entertainment Producer Stanley Appel is putting his mark on the programme, and doing a good job of it as well. He's the kind of person the BBC might like to turn to if it ever considers some sort of Year Zero revamp of Top of the Pops around 03/10/1991.

[29] Stephanie Mills: The Medicine Song. On video. At one point bolts of electricity come out of her ears. What's that all about? (Fact John- She was once married to Jeffrey Daniel of Shalamar dontcha know)

[20] Paul Young: I'm Gonna Tear Your Playhouse Down. Paul Young has been absent from Top of the Pops since The Flying Pickets kept Love Of The Common People off the number one slot at the end of 1983. For reasons that never become clear his band are all dishevelled and oil-stained. It's as if they've just come back from a hard day on the oil rigs. The playhouse must be a metaphor for Big Oil and the song a reference to the 1911 breakup of Standard Oil under the Sherman Antitrust Act in America. Not oil-stained and dishevelled are The Fabulously Wealthy Tarts, better known as Maz Roberts and Kim Lesley. That's because they're not on stage. What happened? Have they split from Paul Young? Did they finally realise that their fabulous wealth meant they never needed to work again?

[35] Alison Moyet: All Cried Out. Some very low angled camera shots provide a smashing view of the lighting grid; look there's the red Transmission sign; and over there is a slightly blurry No Smoking sign.

[13] The Style Council: Shout To The Top. On stage with Paul Weller is Dee C Lee, ex of Wham! I wonder if they met in the dressing rooms?

[1] Stevie Wonder: I Just Called To Say I Love You. Mmm! Toast. It's the taste of a new generation. Eight out of ten owners said their cat prefers it. Double your pleasure, double your fun with toast.

[38] Bruce Springsteen: Cover Me. Audience dancing and credits and toast.

Performance of the week:  Alison Moyet: All Cried Out and toast.